The problem is: I love our life. Everyone feeds themselves. Everyone sleeps all night (and I mean I put them in bed, and don't get disturbed until 8:30/9 the next morning-heaven). There is a one child to one parent ratio. As my husband says "We have one of each, we are done!" And right now it takes us a good while to get out the door. I can only imagine if I added a 3rd to the mix.
And I also feel I know what people are going to say. It gets easier, the older one can help, etc., etc. But does it? Get easier? It's taken me a good 2-3 years to even get a handle on this whole motherhood thing. And truth is I still struggle every day. Going from 0 to 1 child was ten times harder than going from 1 to 2 kids, but I'm thinking 2 to 3 is a big jump.
I feel a bit horrible even writing about this but it has seriously weighed on my mind as of late. I realize I am lucky because I can just decide when to have kids (although who says it would happen easy for me a 3rd time?), and I should be grateful to even be having this discussion. But still.
I mean it should be a hard decision right?